Oh, what’s this? The Suckling? I wonder if this movie is any good. What is it that they say? Ah, that’s right…
“What’s in a name? Everything.”
Oh. Oh, no. That doesn’t bode well. Well, I can at least say that the monster on the cover of the box is fucking awesome looking. Look at that guy! He’s all head and teeth and grossness!
I also have to give it props for two things written up on for real, very reliable websites. The first, is the very brief synopsis given on Amazon Prime Video: “An aborted fetus dumped in a sewer full of toxic sludge returns. Newly restored in HD.” Fuck yeah! We got a dumpster baby! AND! AND! It’s been restored to high goddamn definition! That just kills me. That part at the end about it being newly restored is likely not going to be the selling point for any normal person looking for a movie for this evening’s entertainment. Continue reading “The Suckling (1990)”
Holy shit… This is the 100th post for B-Movie Enema. Yowzers. How am I going to celebrate?
I’ve already looked at one Captain America movie way back in May 2016. So why am I double dipping? Because Cap is my A-1 Super Guy. He fights for freedom and awesomeness.
And also… America. Fuckin’ pure America. Pure like Budweiser changing their name to America. Continue reading “Captain America (1990)”
The Fantastic Four is Marvel Comics’ “first family”. Without them, there literally is no Marvel. They were the brainchild of Stan Lee and Jack Kirby and launched in 1961 to capitalize on the re-emergence of superhero popularity in comic books that had waned by the late 1950s.
The Fantastic Four was comprised of leader Reed Richards (Mr. Fantastic) who could stretch like rubber, Susan Storm (Invisible Girl) who could turn herself invisible, The Thing (Ben Grimm) who was a hulking rock monster, and Johnny Storm (The Human Torch) who was both Susan’s brother and able to light himself on fire. They treated each other as family and even argued like one too. It was the first real example of a team of superheroes who didn’t always get along. Despite the overall high sci-fi type of tales they would tell, Lee and Kirby had created something that had a realistic flavor to the characters and their interactions. Continue reading “The Fantastic Four (1994)”
The final film of my Summer of Anniversaries event celebrates the 25th anniversary of Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth.
However, we’re a couple weeks early on the celebration end. Oddly enough, 1992 didn’t have much for me to choose from. 1987 and 1997 had a bunch. But in order to find something celebrating a 25th anniversary, I had to look to September.
For a movie that takes place in New York City with all sorts of hell breaking loose.
With the Twin Towers appearing in the background of the poster. Continue reading “Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (1992)”
Until today, I’ve only seen one Shaquille O’Neal movie ever – Blue Chips. And that movie was “supposed” to be “good”. It wasn’t. If you want to watch a good movie about a basketball player going into college starring an actual basketball player, watch Spike Lee’s He Got Game.
I’m already off topic.
The point I’m trying to make is that I like Shaq on the court. I like Shaq on pre-game and halftime shows. I like Shaq in commercials hocking insurance from The General. But let’s not deny the fact that, besides being a guy who I think is seemingly terribly nice and charismatic as a person, he can’t act. Continue reading “Steel (1997)”
Holy fishdicks, Batman! This week’s B-Movie Enema feature is, without a doubt, one of the most reviled comic book movies ever. This (along with another fourth movie in its franchise I’ll be talking about later this summer) effectively killed a relatively popular and very profitable Batman franchise.
Since it turns 20 this week, and this is a summer in which I’ll be focusing on those movies celebrating anniversaries, of course I’ll be featuring Batman and Robin. Continue reading “Batman and Robin (1997)”
We’ve come to the end of Alyssa Milano Month here at B-Movie Enema and ladies and gents, I have saved the biggest treat for last – Embrace of the Vampire.
Go back twenty some years. You’re a guy roughly my age. You also work at a video store. You remember watching a little show on TV called Who’s the Boss and you very likely had a major crush on Tony’s daughter, Samantha (Milano, no duh). She was spunky, she was cute, she was awesome. She was your girlfriend each week when the show came on. Continue reading “Embrace of the Vampire (1995)”
Oh ho, yessir! Things are really starting to heat up here in our Alyssa Milano Month tribute at B-Movie Enema with the arrival of Poison Ivy II: Lily.
We started out the month seeing her as a pixie-haired street revolutionary with wild clothes and men fixated on her ass (rightfully so) with Double Dragon. We then saw her play a sorta-nun in Deadly Sins. Last week we heard the Confessions of Sorority Girls. Now, we start to dive into her more sultry roles with the queen bee of all her sultry roles to come next week. Continue reading “Poison Ivy II: Lily (1996)”