After Blue March, I wasn’t exactly sure where to go for the next B-Movie Enema. I mean where do you go after you’ve watched five consecutive pornos from the 70s and 80s? Who or what should I feature that could possibly make you feel a little less sleazy about watching pornos for your movie review site?
Then it hit me – Brad motherfuckin’ Jones.
Yup, the Cinema Snob himself. Shit, that guy has seen waaaaaay more porn that I have. He might even argue that his entire career is owed greatly to the golden age of porn. Jones has made a handful of movies over the years – either as a writer or director or both. I could have looked at several of his credits – the hilarious Jesus, Bro! or some of his smaller budget movies like Disco or Paranoia. Ultimately, there really is only one thing I could possibly choose, the 2012 origin film of his most popular character, The Cinema Snob Movie. Continue reading “The Cinema Snob Movie (2012)”
Let’s talk about Norman J. Warren.
He’s someone who I’ve yet to really feature on this blog, but I will be correcting that big time from this point forward. He’s a British filmmaker who was always into the movies growing up. His films were often deemed part of British “New Wave” Horror. Basically, taking what Amicus and Hammer did with sexuality and gore and pushing it a little further for the end of the 70s and beginning of the 80s.
His movies are really interesting – and, in my opinion, actually fascinating and fun to watch, if not good. He seems to have ideas, even if what he starts with isn’t that groundbreaking. Want to tell a ghost story? Well, he’ll tweak it here and there and include a time element and give you Bloody New Year. Want to tell a story about an alien coming to Earth? Well, how about we throw in abuse and a lesbian couple and a sinister reason for the alien to be here and give you Prey. How about yet another alien story, but this time include impregnation and have the mother of the new alien/human hybrid become murderously protective of the monster? Yeah, we’ll call that Inseminoid. Continue reading “Terror (1978)”
You know what I haven’t had in a while? The sudden urge to kill myself out of utter desperation.
Er… I mean a Cannon Films movie. I… Um. That’s what’s I meant. Uh… Anyway, one thing that you can definitely say about the Cannon gurus Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus is that they sure think they know what people want. In the example of X-Ray (aka Hospital Massacre), they assumed we all wanted a slasher film in a hospital with a hot babe.
Their assumptions were right, but we also kind of want some sort of story that makes sense. Is that here in this movie? No? Yes? Not really? Continue reading “X-Ray (aka Hospital Massacre, 1982)”
There are few things about the 80s more true than the following:
1. Kids went to college.
2. Slasher movies happened – sometimes at colleges.
The topic of this week’s B-Movie Enema is the 1984 slasher flick, Splatter University. However, it’s not really 1984. The film was initially filmed in 1981. When the runtime was only 65 minutes, they went back and filmed 13 more minutes in 1982. So, really I guess this movie has three potential years of release.
And the movie REALLY struggles with the dimension of time – more on that later. Continue reading “Splatter University (1984)”
Welcome back to yet another B-Movie Enema. I’ve been looking forward to talking about this one for a while.
Many times over the past couple years, I’ve mentioned the Roku channel Bizarre TV. When I first got my Roku, it was one of the very first channels I began to watch religiously for its streaming of, well, bizarre movies and horror shorts. Some of the movies shown there acted as inspiration for me to cover here – even if that channel was not the first place I ever saw the movie. Sadly, that channel has been on autopilot since October as the original operator of the channel passed away in January 2018. I still endeavor to cover movies I used to watch on the channel because it did a lot to inspire me to return to the blog after some time away from it.
This week’s feature, Cheerleader Camp, is one of those movies featured on BTV. Continue reading “Cheerleader Camp (1988)”
I’m gonna guess it doesn’t take too much to understand why I’m doing this movie, but, nonetheless, this week’s B-Movie Enema is a little 2014 “comedy” I found on Amazon Prime Video called After School Massacre.
I mean, the cover’s got the word “massacre” in the title. There’s a bloody knife. It’s got a shitty tagline of “Some students just don’t make the grade.” “After school” takes me back to the cheesy, but still classic, ABC Afterschool Specials that taught me the dangers of strangers and drugs and pregnancy. It looks like the killer committing the titular massacre is hiding under a bath towel… Or, wait, I guess he’s under the bed. Continue reading “After School Massacre (2014)”
So here’s a bit of a rarity on B-Movie Enema – a movie I’m coming into practically blind.
I’ve watched the trailer for this week’s feature, Terror on Tour, and it looks pretty shitty. I think it’s supposed to be some sort of KISS band with guys in white and black makeup in tight clothes and capes and shit who begin to kill people or something? No, maybe it’s like an early version of Insane Clown Posse or something because they kinda look like clowns? All I know is that you know you’re in good hands when there is no such thing as a poster for the movie. All you got is a VHS cover, and it’s a Media VHS release no less. Continue reading “Terror on Tour (1980)”
Since returning from hiatus, I’ve written about a Canadian movie and a movie from 1987. This week, I cover a 1987 Canadian movie. Huh… Funny how things work out.
Zombie Nightmare is one of those flicks that marries heavy metal and horror. I’ve touched upon this before with Black Roses – which also happens to be a Canadian horror movie. However, this one has a few very distinct reasons for why I wanted this on the blog.
First, this is a Mystery Science Theater 3000 alum. It’s a pretty solid episode as well. Second, our star, Jon Mikl Thor, had this and another movie with “Nightmare” in the title from 1987 that just simply need to be here on B-Movie Enema. Finally, it was one of the final six movies to be looped on Bizarre TV before the Roku channel’s original owner, Ronda Baffes, passed away. Bizarre TV was such a huge part of how I was able to get this far with the blog, I feel like I owe it some continued love. Continue reading “Zombie Nightmare (1987)”